20 Things Every Twentysomething Should Know How to Do

First things first, most twentysomethings are too hard on themselves.

It’s one of the downsides of a youth-obsessed culture. We tend to think if we haven’t published our first book, planted our first church or gotten married by the time we’re 30, then we’re on the fast track for a lonely, penniless death which will be mourned by none. Sure, some people get famous when they turn 25. Some people also swim across the English Channel.

Your twenties are a prime time to explore and grow, without all the baggage that comes with settling down and making your mark. (Jesus Himself was an unknown carpenter in a reviled corner of Israel until He was 30.)

That said, there are a few things every twentysomething should know how to do.

1. Make a Great Breakfast

Ideally, you should be able to craft a great meal for any occasion, but this is the most important meal of the day and so, it’s the one you should have down. Use real butter, large eggs, fresh mushrooms, cheese, whatever, but know the ins and outs and invite a lot of people over to eat it with you regularly.

2. Argue Kindly

An increasingly rare trait, but you’ll be better for it. Learn how to have your own opinions (and make sure they’re actually yours—not just something you “heard somewhere”) and how to put them firmly and politely, in a way that invites spirited conversation. It's a rare and wonderful thing.

3. Hold a Conversation With Someone of Any Age

Whether the person you’re talking to is eight or 80, you should be able to hold a meaningful, intentional conversation with them. Remember to ask a lot of questions, be more interested in who they are than in who you are, and strive to make their day.

4. Parallel Park

Nothing menial about it, and not nearly as hard as it looks. Practice a little. Become an expert. Dazzle your friends.

5. Defend Your Media Choices

Whether you like Kendrick, Kings of Leon or Ke$ha, you should be able to articulate why. The media we consume affects us, and you should be able to explain to yourself why you’re listening, watching and reading the things that you are.

6. Limit Your Online Life

This cannot be over-emphasized. The inability to manage an online presence has toppled promising careers and made fools out of otherwise competent individuals. You should have a good grip on how often you use social media and what you’re using it for. If you find most of your free time spent on the Internet, it’s time to make some choices. If you’re checking your phone at every awkward pause, delete that Facebook app.

7. Approach a Stranger

Whether it’s for directions, a favor or even just to pass the time on an airplane, knowing how to strike up a conversation out of the blue is a marvelous skill. Ask them questions (don’t lead with information about yourself), be approachable (not aggressive) and look for clues that they’d rather be left alone.

8. Stand Up for Yourself

Whether it’s your boss shooting down an idea before you’ve explained it or a guy shouting rude comments as you’re walking by, you should know how to keep from getting walked over.

9. Say “I Was Wrong”

A relationship squabble. A professional tiff. A theological debate. Whatever it is, you should always be looking for where you might have messed up. “I was wrong” is a magical little sentence that diffuses conflict and brings peace to any situation. You should have it at the top of your go-to phrases.

10. Brew a Great Cup of Coffee or Tea

Look. Once and for all, turning on the coffeemaker and brewing a pot of coffee is totally fine. But you should also be aware how to make a perfect cup of coffee or tea. For yourself. For your friends. Do a little reading. Perfect your technique. It’s a skill you’ll be glad you have forever.

11. Tip Generously

What’s just an extra buck or two to you can completely make your server’s day. Make it a habit to tip generously and, if you’re really feeling daring, write a brief thank you note on your check.

12. Maintain a Mentor

Your twenties are a great time to invest in a mentor. Find someone you want to be like—be it your pastor, a friend or even a peer—and commit to meeting with them regularly. It takes a little humility and a lot of dedication, but there is no ceiling to the value it will add to your life.

13. Bite Your Tongue

Know how to pick your battles. It’s OK for you to be right without getting everyone to admit you’re right. It’s OK for you to be offended by something without everyone knowing you’re offended. Understand when you should go to bat for what you’re thinking and when you can let it go.

14. Stay Well Rested

Late nights will come (if you’ve got kids, they’ll come pretty frequently) but our generation has forgotten the value in a good night’s sleep. Push yourself to go to bed earlier. Utilize your downtime wisely. Resting is just as important as being productive. In fact, you’ll be more productive if you are resting well and often.

15. Respond to Criticism

Defending yourself against criticism is easy. Graciously accepting it is harder, but the improvements it can make to your life and work are wild. Remember that criticism usually isn’t meant to be a personal attack and, if you can learn to take it in the spirit it's offered, people will have fewer things to criticize you about in the future.

16. Write a Cover Letter

Filling out an application is a pretty simple process but, in all likelihood, the job you really want is going to take more than a list of references and previous employers. Cover letters require some effort, but it can be the difference between “don’t call us, we’ll call you” and “when can you start?”

17. Be Alone

The Millennial generation prizes community, which is very good, but it tends to come at the cost of fearing loneliness. The truth is, being alone can do you a lot of good. Be able to sit quietly—reading, writing, praying or just listening to the silence—and use that time to truly evaluate how your spirit is. Loneliness is exercise for your heart. Do it regularly.

18. Recommend a Book, Movie or Album

It's harder than it sounds. It’s easy to sound like a pretentious snob or a gushing fan when you’re telling someone to check out something you love. Be able to explain not only why you love something, but why you think someone else would love it.

19. Prioritize the Important Over the Urgent

There are two types of demands on your life. The first and easiest to focus on are the urgent: paying your rent, getting ahead in work, etc. The second and much harder to tackle are the important: your spiritual life, your relationship with your family and looking after the health of your soul. Know the difference between what’s urgent and what’s important, and know which one matters more.

20. Hold on to a Good Friend

There’s going to be a lot of transition in your twenties as both you and your friends float from job to job and location to location. You’ll have to say a lot of good bye’s in the midst of it all, but you should know when you’ve found the rare friend who you don’t want to lose, and you should be able to prioritize staying in touch with them beyond the occasional text message.

repost from: http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/whole-life/20-things-every-twentysomething-should-know-how-do

20 Things Every Twentysomething Should Have

Your twenties have been called the “defining decade." It’s the time in your life when you not only make big decisions about your career, relationships and finances, it’s also when you figure out what being an adult is all about.

Obviously, there’s nothing magical that happens when you turn 30 (or even 40 or 50 for that matter), but being well equipped when your starting out as a real-life grown up can help set the course for decades to come.

Here’s our look at the 20 things every twentysomething should have.

A Constantly Growing Library

Maintaining a growing library of books that you’ve read (whether it’s on your Kindle or iPad or, you know, one of those actual “shelves” that old mansions in the movies have), is a good habit to get into at any age. But, if you can make the time to constantly read quality books during the busyness of your 20s, you can do it at any age.

Someone to Hold You Accountable

The difference between a temptation and a mistake often just comes down to accountability. Having people in our lives who’ll let us know when we’re making poor decisions can end up saving us a lot of heartache. This also goes for fashion accountability. A true friend is one who can tell you that you’re just not pulling off that Heisenberg hat.

Something You Can Wear to a Job Interview

If you already have a job you like, go ahead and substitute “job interview” for “wedding,” “corporate event” or “Lower Eastside masquerade ball” (hey, you never know). Owning a good suit/dress is part of being an adult, but that doesn’t mean it still can’t be fun. Buy something you’ll actually enjoy wearing and be willing to invest in quality, even if you’re not the type to dress up often. (ProTip: Guys, your job interview outfit should not include a Heisenberg hat.)

Someone Who Looks Up to You

Finding someone you can be an example to and speak into doesn’t just benefit the other person—it can help you grow as an adult and actually make you want to become a better person yourself.

A Journal

Your twenties are arguably the most formative decade of your life. It might be a good idea to have some written record of it that doesn't just exist on Twitter.

A Pastor Who Knows You By Name

Even if you’re a member of a church, getting to know a pastor personally can encourage you to do more than just get involved—it builds a relationship with someone you’d be comfortable talking to and praying with in times of need.

A Bike

It’s impossible to not have fun when you’re riding a bike. Don’t believe us? Go for a bike ride, and thank us later.

A Passport

Passports aren’t exactly cheap (for a first-time traveler, they’ll set you back about $135), but obviously, if you ever want to travel abroad, you’re going to need one. You may not already have a trip to Bali booked, but it’s a good idea to go ahead and get one anyways: They take a few weeks to process, so if some sort of international opportunity/vacation/mission trip arises, you’ll be ready.

A Friend You’ve Had for More than 10 Years

Maintaining friendships isn’t always easy. But with the rise of Facebook, there’s no excuse for not staying connected to people from your past. Keeping old friends not only reminds us of where we came from; it can also help to show us the people we’ve become.

A Friend You’ve Had for Less Than a Year

You’re probably out of school now, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still meet new people and make new friends. Get plugged in at your church, join a sports league or actually attempt the ancient and forgotten practice of meeting your neighbors. Making new friends is just as important as keeping your old ones.

A Good Pair of Running/Athletic Shoes

Ask someone in their thirties or forties, and they’ll tell you: Eventually, your metabolism slows down, your joints start to ache and all those late night nacho sessions start to catch up with you. Start a lifestyle of fitness when you’re in the twenties, and you can prevent a lot of health problems before they get a chance to start.

A Hard Copy of a Bible

Don’t get us wrong, YouVersion and digital Bible tools are great and put tons of valuable research resources right at your fingertips. But nothing can replace a good old fashioned, ink on paper, bound copy of the Bible. Write in it. Highlight it. Bookmark it. But whatever you do, make it your own and make it personal.

A 5-Year Plan

The best way to try to get to where you want to be in five years is mapping out a plan to get there. Figure out what career, ministry, education or travel opportunities you want to take, write out a doable plan and start making it happen.

A Willingness to Throw Your 5-Year Plan Out the Window

Plans are great. A lot of successful people got to where they are today by sticking to a masterfully-crafted 5-year roadmap. But sometimes, life changes and new opportunities arise. Don’t be so married to your own plan for your life that you become unwilling to see what else God puts on your path.

A Savings/Retirement Account

It’s never too late (or too early) to get started saving. And once you get an emergency savings account established, the money you put away for retirement starts to add up fast.

A Big Dream

Want to start an innovative company? Find a way to help people in need? Publish a book, sell a script or release an album? In your twenties it’s easy to let old dreams fade as the daily realities of adulthood set in. But there’s really only one way for your life dream to die—and that’s if you let it.

A Back-up Alarm Clock

Preferably one that is placed out of arm’s reach from your bed. Because that snooze button on the iPhone is one thing that Apple made a little too intuitive.

A Social Cause You Believe In

Find an organization, cause or social need that moves you, and get involved. Twentysomethings have a massive cultural influence—use it for something good. Get educated on an international need, social justice mission or ministry opportunity, and become an advocate for a cause that is important to you.

A Parental Figure You Can Trust

There’s a high likelihood that you’ll encounter some major milestones between the ages of 20 and 30: Accepting your first “real” job, deciding between buying and renting a home, getting married and even becoming a parent are very real possibilities. Being able to talk with someone who’s been there before—whether it’s your own parents or someone older who you trust—can make some life’s hardest decisions a little bit easier and your twenty’s biggest moments less stressful.

source:http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/20-things-every-twentysomething-should-have

8 Ways to Not Procrastinate

In college I had a friend, George, who would wait until the night before his paper was due to begin writing it. Most of the time he would even begin reading the required books the same night. He would stay up all night, write the paper and turn it in around 9 a.m. the next morning. If you happened to come upon George during that particular 12-hour period, you would have witnessed an intensely focused college student furiously typing away on his laptop. Brandishing headphones, amidst a sea of abandoned coffee cups, open books and paper, George somehow always pulled it off. His ability to procrastinate and still meet the deadline was truly amazing. 

Apparently, George was not alone in his procrastination—but probably fairly alone in succeeding at it. Depending on the study, researchers have found that somewhere between 80 to 95 percent of college students (and to some extent, we can be sure, the entire population) procrastinate on their work. So whether it’s college assignments, work deliverables or home projects the odds are most of us have procrastinated on something in our lives.

Other studies have shown that those who report procrastinating on a chronic basis have more health problems, higher stress levels and more relationship problems than those who do not procrastinate on a regular basis. So chronic procrastination can be a real problem. But you don’t have to let procrastination win when it comes to getting things done in your life. Here are eight ways you can beat procrastination:

1. Admit Delaying

If you read any material about changing your behavior, the first part always involves admitting the problem. In this case your problem happens to be procrastination. How do you know when you’re not admitting your procrastination? Well, all of a sudden, your bedroom needs to be cleaned. No, actually, disinfected. Or better yet, perhaps a roach bomb is what the doctor ordered. You get the picture. When all of a sudden you find yourself easily distracted and typically avoidable tasks become your obsessive priority, you know you’re procrastinating. As soon as you take the plunge and acknowledge your procrastination, you are now in control. You are in control of whether or not you choose to toothbrush-scrub your kitchen floor, start that school application or outline your work presentation.

2. Schedule a Meeting … With Yourself

If you find you are continually procrastinating and not making any progress on your task at hand, you need to schedule a meeting with yourself. Put it on your calendar and don’t be late. If you have a deliverable at work that is due in two weeks, the first step is to guess how long it’s going to take you to complete it. Then schedule meetings on your calendar that will give you the appropriate amount of time to focus on that deliverable. An added bonus is when your co-workers interrupt you during the day and ask if you “have a second,” you can tell them you’re not available. You’re in a meeting. You don’t have to tell them who it’s with. By setting a date and time to work on your deliverable, you will be more likely to actually do it. Who knows, you might even complete it ahead of schedule.  

3. Work at Your Best Time

We all have certain times of the day when we feel at our best. When do you feel like you are firing on all cylinders? That is the time you want to work on your task. (This is also a great time to schedule that meeting with yourself, if you are able.) If 8 a.m. is your best time, it’s probably not a good idea to start working on your taxes at 9 p.m. If you’re a night owl and 10 p.m. is your best time of the day, feel free to bust out your W-2 after the kids go to sleep. Whether your best time is 8 a.m. or 10 p.m., be sure to work on the thing you’ve been procrastinating on during that time.

4. Break It Down

Take what you need to do and break it down into smaller more digestible parts. If you need to clean out your garage, don’t feel like you have to do it all at once. Pick a Saturday and just focus on removing things you haven’t used in a year. Then pick another day to sweep it out. Then choose a different day to organize what you want to keep. The key is to do only one part of the task or project at a time. If you get started on something small, you’ll find it’s much easier to keep working on it. You’ll feel like you’ve made some good progress so you might as well finish the job.

5. Delegate

Is there someone else who can do the work for you? Perhaps you can ask a friend or co-worker to take on that task you’ve been dreading. Or is it something you can pay to have done? You always want to evaluate if someone else can appropriately take care of it for you (as long as it’s not something that truly falls within your responsibility as a spouse, parent, student or employee.) If you’ve been procrastinating on getting something done, it may be because you simply don’t enjoy what you have to do. Maybe you volunteered to organize the “holiday” party at work this year to get in good with the boss, and it turns out you hate event planning. Find the people in your office who love event planning. (Trust me, they are there.) Get them involved and give them specific action items to be responsible for.  Fortunately, there are always others who will enjoy something you don’t like doing. Think of it this way: by delegating it, you have given them an opportunity to enjoy themselves.

6. Reward Yourself

We’re designed to respond to rewards and punishments. It’s no different when it comes to motivating yourself. Go ahead and give yourself a reward for working through your procrastination. You can give yourself small rewards for milestones on the way to your final goal. Or perhaps you wait and really reward yourself when all is said and done. Have you been holding off on buying that new phone? Maybe that’s your reward for losing 10 pounds. Do you want a new outfit? Reward yourself with a shopping trip after you send in that grad school application. The key is finding something that will truly motivate you to do the thing you don’t want to do.

7. Make Yourself Accountable

Make your goal public. Tell other people what you intend to do and when you want to do it. It’s not for the faint of heart, but the possibility of public embarrassment is always a surefire way to guarantee you’ll get it done. Perhaps you have a goal to write a book by a certain date. Go ahead and post it on your Facebook page. If you’re really brave, you can even ask your friends to check in on your progress. The upside is that you’ll most likely reach your goal. The downside is your ego is on the line, and if you drop the ball, the humiliation factor is high. However, this is a great way to make sure you accomplish something really important. 

8. Just Do It

There’s a reason why this tag line works so well. (If you don’t know whose tag line this is, you may be one of the 3.5 million people who still subscribe to dial-up Internet.) Sometimes in life you have to just do it. Just do it when you don’t feel like doing it. Just do it when every fiber of your being wants to do something else. Sometimes you just have to get it over with and move on. So if none of the other tips work for you, go ahead; just do it and get it over with. You’ll feel so much better.

You don’t have to be like my friend George, waiting until the last minute and risking the chance of success. You can beat procrastination. So unless you really do enjoy a good toothbrush-scrubbing of your kitchen floor, go ahead and try one of these tips. Besides a few large boxes on your to-do list, what have you got to lose?

source: http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/career-money/features/27338-8-tips-for-beating-procrastination